My husband, our eighteen-month old son and I, moved back in with my parents just under two months ago.
It’s been a turbulent six weeks.
The reason for our move was simple. We wanted to save money while we built our own home.
We had been renting and the landlord hiked up our weekly rent by over 10%. Since we had just purchased a block of land and didn’t want to be making mortgage repayments plus rent, my parents suggested we move back in. They had two empty rooms, they both work during the day, and there was an end date in sight.
Twelve months. At least that’s the plan.
We contribute to the housework, pay our portion of the bills and weekly groceries, so we’re not living for free. Our biggest saving is not having to pay rent.
Now before you go and argue that moving back in with the folks is irresponsible, wrong, and embarrassing or whatever other emotion comes to mind. Stop. And. Think. For. Just. A. Moment.
Every person’s situation is different. So is their personality, their job, their money habits and everything else.
It’s our responsibility to help each other.
If I was a dole bludger with no sense of responsibility I would hope my parents would have the decency to kick me out and tell me to get my shit together. Since this isn’t the case, I don’t see moving back home as being an issue.
Emotionally, it is though. There are days I feel like a complete failure (I’m not), it seems I’ve taken two steps back but I know that financially it’s actually two steps forward. The short term sacrifice will provide long term gain.
My son loves having his grandparents around every day. They love having him around too. Before my mum would have to drive to our place to babysit two days a week, now it’s all on the spot. It’s incredible how much joy a child brings.
Here are a few things I’ve found make the transition a lot easier.
- Set a time limit for the living arrangements. You need to have an end date in sight. Moving back in with your parents cannot become an indefinite scenario. You’re going to drive each other bonkers.
- Have a plan. If you’re lucky enough not to pay rent, make sure the money that you’re saving is immediately diverted to either your mortgage, savings or loan repayments, so that it doesn’t get frittered away. And believe me, it’s very easy to spend when you should be saving.
- Create rules. When you have a house with four adults, a toddler, a dog and a cat, you need rules in the house. Naturally, the toddler and animals will be harder to discipline but the adults need to stay in line. A set of rules relating to the living arrangements, bills, cooking and cleaning, needs to be set. It’ll reduce fights down the line.
- Make a roster and hanging it up on the fridge. Each person needs to have a responsibility. The cooking, cleaning, taking the dog out, feeding the animals, and even nap time needs to be rostered on. It’s much easier to keep an organised house if everyone knows what they are doing.
- Solo time is vital for your sanity. Make the time to get away, even if it’s just for a few hours. Living in a house with your family can be hard work and taking a breather is vital.
- Enjoy the time you have together.
Have you ever had to move back home with your parents? How would you handle living under the same roof?